Fat Girl Shopping

Let’s face it.  Dressing rooms are not a fat chick’s friend.  It doesn’t matter how much effort the store puts into creating a home like environment, once you step behind that door the lighting is rarely, if ever, flattering and shows off every dimple, wrinkle and errant roll from every angle imaginable.  I have never understood how stores expect to sell clothing under such conditions. 

The reality is that for a curvy girl, clothing shopping can be a challenge.  We have more assets to accentuate and yes, a few more areas to minimize.  Most stores segregate we deliciously plump ladies, offering professional women in our 30’s the same sort of fair they offer our 90 year old grandmothers. I do not wear floral print cardigan sweaters with matching pastel stretch pants.  How did stretch pants even come back in style?  And why are they offered in big girl sizes?  Of course, we do have our own fat girl stores which theoretically specialize in fashion forward stylings.  Theoretically. 

Still, I had my list of essentials I needed to get and I had outlined my plan of attack which was promptly thwarted by a holiday.  Every store on the list would be closed for Easter.  Who knew?  It is a big bunny that hides eggs, people.  Some of us would like to spend our hard earned cash on some well deserved new clothes on the one day of the month we actually have free.  But I digress.

I am a creative problem solver and really, this problem was far too easy to solve:  pray to the weather gods for a massive rain storm that would somehow cancel flyball practice so that I could get my shopping done on Saturday.  Sure, I wouldn’t have my team of girlfriends to provide me loads of moral support but it would be done.  I woke up Sunday morning to pouring rain.  We live in the desert.  It rarely rains but here it was.  Flyball was cancelled and I was off in search of clothes that actually fit.

The shopping itself was not that bad, not because there were plentiful choices or everyone had exactly what I wanted at the exact price I demanded but rather, I discovered something I hadn’t expected in one of those dreary little cubes of torture:  The one pair of size 16 slacks I have at home is not a fluke of design.  Almost everywhere I went, I comfortably slid into a size 16.  SIXTEEN.  In fact, 83% of all my purchases were a size 16.  That realization in itself made the hours of putting on and taking off clothing, bitter stares from sales associates who were clearly miffed that I had three sizes of every item to try on, and the really REALLY bad elevator music well worth my time and effort.  I am looking GOOD!

In the end, I found the following:  2 pairs of work slacks, one in a gorgeous light gray and the other a traditional beige; 7 springy blouses appropriate for both work and going out; one tech shirt for running with the cutest lightweight hoodie for race days; two pairs of denim capris that I have lusted after for 10 years and which look absolutely fabulous; two pairs of low rise, boot cut jeans; one very cute black sweater that goes with everything; two girly belts for all occasions; and one hell of an ego boost.  I should also add that I beat my budget by over $100 so there may be a few more items in my future…That is, if I can bring myself to go shopping again.